Saturday, November 15, 2008

I am SO done with the Chinese

Ok, I've had it!
Toys with toxic paint, milk powder tainted with melamine, unethical and dangerous computer "recycling" centers that dump toxic chemicals into water and burn into the air where children live and play.....what next?

Well, I'll tell you what next!
I ORDERED CHINESE FOOD FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MONTHS AND WHAT HAPPENS?
I. Get. Sick!

I can't say exactly what caused my horrible day yesterday....but I'm willing to bet it was the Chinese food from Wednesday night. Usually they are good at that place.
But what else could it have been? Surely not the turkey samich I ate for lunch on Wednesday. I was sick Thursday morning...I had nausea and an irritable bowel. Later in the day I totally puked my guts out - so forceful was it that I peed my pants in the process and there was nothing I could do about it but feel utterly pathetic and to continue vomiting and peeing in my pants until the session was over. It's not like I could stop throwing up to sit on the toilet and tinkle out whatever was left. Horrible.

All day I felt nauseated and then I had diarrhea get worse and worse until late in the evening and by then my butthole would sting each time I went. Sorry this is so graphic but it felt worse than any words could describe. I was achy all day, pain in my back, my spine, all my muscles and joints, and a headache by evening. I had no fever as far as I know. I couldn't stand up too long without being dizzy and I dozed off and on all day. Thank goodness my dad was able to come over and watch the kids for me so I could be left alone to doze in my room. I don't know what I would have done without him. I would have to have called my husband home.

I am so glad that I am feeling a bit better today.
I still feel a bit weak and delicate - and my appetite is much to be desired but at least I don't feel like I'm going to puke any moment and nothing is coming out of my butt.

So that's it.
I'm boycotting China.
I love the silks and stuff, but you know what?
I always did like Japanese culture better. Language, products, people, samurai, I mean come on. Pearl Harbor, well that was pretty shitty, but I guess after Hiroshima nobody really wants that kind of warring relationship anyway. I mean they invented karaoke! Awesome! They can be a bit strange (stress balls that look like boobs in street vending machines for example) but at least they don't fuck everything up any time they get a good thing going *cough* CHINA *cough* - Chinese history is so disappointing.

AND ONE MORE THING, CHINA.
STOP BURNING ALL THAT COAL INTO THE AIR, YOU BUNCH OF BASTARDS!
AND STOP KILLING BABIES JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE OVER-POPULATED! IF YOU WOULD PUT IN SOME PLANNED PARENTHOODS OR LET THEM MOVE OUT OF THE COUNTRY YOU WOULDN'T HAVE THAT PROBLEM!

Thank you, that is all.

3 comments:

  1. Well...I'm glad I threw away my poster of Mao. But I did have Chinese food Friday.
    Sorry for my betrayal of the "Movement."

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  2. Ugh. OMG ugh. I am so sorry you were that sick. I had that happen once, after eating at a Chinese buffet. To this day I can't even drive by one without feeling queasy. Once you're known the joys of spraying from both ends, simultaneously, nothing compares. Hope you're feeling a jillion times better by now.

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  3. I am feeling a jillion times better, thank you for the sentiment!
    It's funny though because as I was ordering it that night, I was playing World of Warcraft and one of my guild members (I am new to it) told me I should call the delivery guy a "ponk beech." I told him I couldn't do that, it was rude....and besides I like their food. I should have listened to that tactless 16 year old! Maybe I would have felt better about the whole ordeal! Eh, probably not. I'm old.

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